Editor’s note: Modern reforms in China have led to a great number of changes in modern Chinese life, none more so than an individual’s right to select whom they love and marry. However, modern Chinese still need help in finding their proper soul mates before they become too old and join the ranks of “leftover” women and men.
This translated Chinese transcript from a CCTV program about China’s singles’ events highlights the expectations and opinions of single Chinese men and women looking for love as well as the troubles they face in finding the “right” Mr or Mrs Right.
The following dialog was taken directly from a CCTV program called “Live News Broadcast” during a segment called “At a Dating Event for Single Men and Women, Woman Confesses: Hurry Up and Chase After Me!” on November 20:
Source: epSos.de
Trying to find love at a singles event in Beijing’s Haidian District
Host: Next we have some social research. Now, our society produces “leftover” men and women (who are in their thirties and still single). These single men and women tell us their opinions towards relationships; on choosing a spouse and marriage. What kind of standards they hold for choosing a spouse? What kind of experience have they had in making friends? How is choosing a spouse difficult?
Comment: This dating event is happening in a shopping mall in Beijing’s Haidian District and takes place just two days after Singles’ Day. Three hundred single men and women turned up, all with just one purpose: to see if they will bump into their soul mate.
Single person: I am 27 years-old this year, my interests and hobbies include singing, and traveling. I am looking for a marriage partner that is mature, filial, and is responsible towards the family.
Single person: I want to find a stable, mature, really down-to-earth person to live the rest of my life with.
Host: Very good. And what are you looking for in a marriage partner?
Single person: It’s really very basic. First, understanding. Secondly, someone who can do house work at the very least, I don’t need those people who act like “princesses” because nothing they do makes any sense. Taking care of a family is the responsibility of two people and not just one.
Single person: Many people have contacted me, but the majority of people are just curious. The reason why I haven’t been successful I think is because these women think that I am not reliable, but what they don’t understand is that that I have no alternative.
Trying to find love at a singles event in Daxing District
Comment: This is the scene of a dating event held in Daxing District. All together over 500 single men and women have gathered here hoping to quit being single before Singles’ Day arrives. An eye-catching “wall of fate” is adorned with heart-shaped cards. People have written their personal information, requirements of a prospective spouse, and also their personal slogans and wishes upon these cards. As densely packed together as they are, these love-seeking cards look a lot like missing persons bulletin.
Single person: Can I be your boyfriend?
Single person: My dear, can we get to know each other here?
Host: Congratulations to these two people who have successfully formed a relationship!
Single person: People like us who are neither old nor young are quite embarrassed. People who are good-looking are at the very least young, like (men) in their twenties. These twenty-something (men) aren’t interested in me, a person who is at the older “auntie” stage of her life. After that there are (the men) in their forties; no matter how handsome they look, there has been some great change or happening in their life that is hard for me to accept.
Reporter: Which year were you born in the eighties?
Single person: In 1986.
Reporter: I suppose at this age you’re already feeling a little anxious?
Single person: Because my family is from in Hebei, they consider me to be a “super leftover woman”, someone who has become a “leftover survivor”. I’m not even a “leftover woman” anymore; I’ve attained a rank higher than that.
Single person: It was my mother that notified me. She said that there was an event and told me to come here.
Reporter: Is your mother very anxious about you finding your soul mate?
Single person: Yes, very anxious.
Reporter: Does she often push you (to get married)?
Single person: She can’t wait to post my picture in parks across Beijing. Even though I have just three months until I procure my Beijing hukou (residence permit), I’ve recently began communications with a girl. She says that she wants a person with an old Beijing hukou; a person with a new Beijing hukou is not good enough.
Remaining hopefully
Comment: Wanting to leave their single status behind, it isn’t enough to just rely on one Singles’ Day event. One needs to make use of each and every opportunity that appears; even Halloween has been used as an opportunity for single men and women to meet their prospective marriage partners. This is especially the case for older single men and women who are especially anxious.
Single person: I want to find a man whom I will love for the rest of my life. I will provide him breakfast every morning, and then I will give birth to two boys and one girl for him. After I have found him, I hope that I won’t have to work anymore but instead get to do things that I like to do. As well, if you let me love you, I will never again look at another man for the rest of my life. I will treat your mother and father well, I will love you the rest of my life. Come quick and find me, I will soon be turning 40. Thank you.
Source: iFeng
Warning：The use of any news and articles published on eChinacities.com without written permission from eChinacities.com constitutes copyright infringement, and legal action can be taken.
Keywords: dating in China leftover women singles events in China; leftover men and women
All comments are subject to moderation by eChinacities.com staff. Because we wish to encourage healthy and productive dialogue we ask that all comments remain polite, free of profanity or name calling, and relevant to the original post and subsequent discussion. Comments will not be deleted because of the viewpoints they express, only if the mode of expression itself is inappropriate.
Please login to add a comment. Click here to login immediately.
Where there is no trust, there also is no love. (Just think of someone you don't trust, what is the feeling you get?)The trust level between people in China is so low (rightly so, they themselves know what they are), how can there be love?
Dec 08, 2013 19:48 Report Abuse
How come none of them seem to be looking for a partner with a sense of humour/nice personality/(insert actual personality trait here). It seems most of them would be best of hiring a maid or getting a sugar daddy, rather than a husband/wife... And what the hell, someone from '86 is considered a leftover? That's two years older than me, and there's no way in hell I'd consider getting married yet, let alone worry about being too old...
Dec 08, 2013 14:31 Report Abuse
The language that these 'leftover' daters use is no less warped than the opulent posturing that young daters use. It's not about personality, and the factor love is out of the question for these cynical characters. Even if I were a 'leftover' single, I'd still have my dignity, and be more interested in personality over finances, child-bearing, housekeeping skills or paperwork. Women have become too overvalued in this country, and are quite comfortable with their essential commodity status. Women are hardwired to find a safe and stable environment, due to child-bearing. It's their job to prioritize these values, but everyone else must offer a counterbalance in order to promote fairness and morality in society. There is no balance at all here, and everything's geared towards safety and stability. The government is corrupt, people are apathic towards anything outside their families, and everything is focused on providing circumstances that will woo the women into marriage and child-bearing. Even education has become pointless: It's just a lucrative bureaucratic industry that those who can afford it buy into in order to get jobs, which are given through bribes and nepotism regardless of competence.
Dec 06, 2013 15:30 Report Abuse
I want to find a man whom I will love for the rest of my life. I will provide him breakfast every morning, and then I will give birth to two boys and one girl for him. After I have found him, I hope that I won’t have to work anymore" ahaha you wanna be a princess? seriously whats wrong with these women? no one that no one wants them. They only want a man who cares for them so they can hang out shopping and wasting money. They think their only duty is to give birth to some kids (3? seriously even 1 would be a waste for those people)
Dec 06, 2013 13:47 Report Abuse
Am I a 'leftover' woman? Never can that be said! I am a woman who revel in her singleness. Loneliness is my companion. And if you see me at a bar laughing and chatting up a storm, my companion is never too faraway from me. So, all you singles, never let desperation drives you into the arms of the wrong man. You will regret not staying single. But seriously though! There are more men than women in China, how is it that there are so many single women here?
Dec 06, 2013 08:30 Report Abuse
maybe because the single women are all looking for an unattinable ideal, rather than seeing the potentially good husbands with lower incomes.
Dec 06, 2013 09:56 Report Abuse
not enough rich men for those spoiled kiddos thats why there are so many leftover women in china
Dec 06, 2013 13:48 Report Abuse
Sign up with
Google
(
(